I deadname myself all the time

Transitioning over to using my chosen name in daily life is so difficult. I still deadname myself when I answer the phone and it is a number I don’t recognise. I am feeling immensely annoyed with myself.

Does anyone have any tricks for making it easier?


8 thoughts on “I deadname myself all the time

  1. Honestly, maybe just practice introducing yourself/answering the phone out loud when you’re alone? Weirdly for me, what caused me to change my name socially at the time I did was that one day I realized I was *already* thinking of my self as Kasey in my head sometimes (it’s a name I had used online in various places for a loooong time), so the transition was relatively smooth for me. You’ll get there, though! It just takes practice 🙂


    • That’s the thing, I’ve been using Eli for a year already in various social circles. I am used to referring to myself as Eli in person. For some weird reason I just keep stumbling over answering the phone. Gah! This is so damn annoying.


      • Hmmm, that is super frustrating! Can you enlist some friends to call you from unknown numbers (either their work or non-mutual friends’ phones?) I’m guessing you don’t get that many phone calls and that might be why your brain hasn’t caught up. My brain still sometimes insists I should answer all phones with the name of the office I worked at two and a half years ago, so.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Um, deadname – very descriptive, but a little creepy. A bit zombie like. But then our old selves are dead, innit? I use given vs chosen name. Gives my chosen name more iwnership. Take care, Eli.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I did it on the phone at first a couple of times, but then got over it – I had a little trouble learning my signature (script J is a very different slant than script A). Three years later, the only thing I have trouble with is initialing things – it must be a different part of motor memory but I really have to stop and think before I initial. I felt like an idiot but I did practice introducing myself, and that helped me to stop using my old name.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Yeah totally, I can’t even get mad at people for messing up when I do it myself so often. Luckily my signature hasn’t changed so I haven’t had to worry about changing my scrawl. LOL!

      I really think it will just take me being conscious of what I’m saying when I answer the phone and once I get it right a few times it will come easier.


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